thediastema's Diaryland Diary

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Eh, eh?

Dear Master,

It is currently I CAN'T FIND MY DAY PLANNER TO TRANSCRIBE THE NAME OF TODAY'S HOLIDAY day, but that could change if the datebook ever turns up.

I've been drinking a lot of store-brand cola drinks, which are the devil's own elixir. Currently rolling over my thick little tongue is Albertson's A+ Cherry Cola (Artificially Flavored [sic] Soda) which boasts "TASTE PLUS VALUE!" below the lip of the can.

A few things can be said of store brand cola drinks, at least from my experience:

1. They're less fizzy due to budget constraints on CO2, which is a very complicated thing to get ahold of. Yeah.

2. They're moderately heavyhanded with the primary flavourings (cola, lemon-lime, and whatever it is humans have decided "doctors" taste like) but really generous with overtones such as cherry or "diet." You know what I'm talking about.

3. The takeoff names are painfully awkward: Mountain Dew becomes Yellow Snow; Dr. Pepper becomes Nurse Ratched; Sprite becomes Puck; etc.

4. These things warp spacetime and they turn your skull into that green foam stuff florists like to use.

Enjoy brand-x soda pop responsibly.

~~

And kill me if I ever lower my standards for clothes like I have for sodas.

~~

A thought I scribbled down earlier today:

I'm fairly certain that Alistair F. Bespectacled, who was just now honourably discharged from the service of making me feel all sparkly with the very act of his walking into a room, won his office in the first place by being polite, polished, and funny, and by walking inaudibly everywhere he went.

In short, by being the opposite of my mother.

Oddly detached am I. I woke today and noticed it right off:

Season go bye-bye. Eh.
Haven't seen HM in ages. Eh.
Bought Gold Membership. (Happy, Andrew?) Eh.
Won't see many favourites from work ever again. Eh.
Mum's in a murderous rage. Eh.

I wonder what made me so disaffected.

~ETK

21:55 - 27 May, 2001

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